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River cruising can be a laidback form of travel so long as you don’t forget these key tips.
Even if you’ve never sailed on a river cruise, in photos advertising the experience of being on a river boat, you can’t miss the vibe: super chill and very relaxing. People are walking around this intimate floating hotel carrying cocktails and lounging on upper decks as they soak up views of the quaint villages and natural wonders they sail past.
To ensure you don’t board the ship feeling frazzled or make some major mistake that screws up your river cruise vacation, there are things you should avoid doing pre-departure or even on board that are going to snap that easy-going vibe in half.
Here are 10 things not to do on a river cruise.
1 OF 10
Don’t Fly Into Port the Same Day the Ship Embarks
Most river boats depart from somewhere in Europe or Asia, so as a result, it takes nearly an entire day to get there. Thinking you can save money by skipping a night in a pre-cruise hotel, and instead flying in just hours before your ship sets sail, might be tempting. This is not a risk you want to take. If your plane arrives late, the captain will leave without you. Everyone else is already on board and ready to rock, and an itinerary has strict arrival and departure times for subsequent ports. It’s better to buffer in a 24-hour period to absorb those hiccups. Otherwise, you’ll be rerouted to the next port—and pray that plane isn’t late—or travel from the original departure city to the next port by train or plane. At this point, you’ve already missed the first two days.
2 OF 10
Don’t Bother Splurging on a Balcony Cabin
Balcony cabins always cost more—whether it’s a river boat or on a large ship—and the assumption is that they are the best although that’s not necessarily true on a river cruise. That’s because most stateroom designs on these smaller ships already feature a glass wall, allowing for killer views, and if there is a balcony, it’s tiny. Smaller ships are sailing rivers, not oceans, and width in the ship design is at a premium. The better place to splurge is on a large ship where a porthole window might be your only view otherwise. Besides, river cruises feature at least two decks, and they are never crowded, as there are fewer than 200 people on board, so you don’t have to reserve a chaise lounge by lying a towel across it or anything silly like that.
3 OF 10
Don’t Skip the Ship’s Shore Excursions
If you’ve sailed large ships in the ocean and had rather unpleasant experiences (they’re crowded and visit tourist traps like rum factories and malls) on canned group tours, it’s understandable why you might want to DIY your time in port. However, on river cruises, guided shore excursions are more intimate, traveling in smaller groups and mostly on foot, even if you have to first take a short bus ride to reach the site or attraction. What you can expect is a slice of small-village life through interactions with people who don’t see cruise-ship travelers every day. You’re going to be immersed in local life and not brought to places only tourists go.
4 OF 10
Don’t Leave Right After the Sailing Ends
We get that you don’t want to use up a ton of vacation days or you’re dying to get back to the dog and kids, but flying all the way to Europe or Asia for only a week is kind of silly. An experience that’s not heavily marketed by river-cruise lines, but should be, is post-sailing excursions, to continue that cruise-y feeling even after the cruise is over. Book a day tour in the final port of call through the river-cruise line and enjoy another day experiencing this destination, which is usually a sizeable city near a major airport. Or, build your own list of things to do. This works especially well with evening flights. You can also book a hotel room and fly out the next day. Some of these ports are large enough that you need two days to experience them, and the itinerary’s sole day is not enough.
5 OF 10
Don’t Leave Your Comfortable Walking Shoes at Home
Caribbean and Mexican itineraries on board large ships are all about beaches, so loose-fitting sandals and flip flops will suffice, but that’s not the deal with river cruises. These ports are walkable villages, and how you’ll likely get around is via your own two feet. Make sure at least one pair of shoes you pack is comfy—you want thick soles, and either ankle support or straps, so that you can navigate cobblestone streets, narrow alleys, waterfront streets, and any other areas that are magical. You don’t want to develop blisters that now mean you are hobbling to and from your cabin, right?
6 OF 10
Don’t Assume There’s Sea Days
Because river-cruise boats sail through more congested areas of the world, as opposed to the wide-open oceans, it doesn’t take long to travel between destinations, as it might between Los Angeles and Los Cabos, or Miami and some Caribbean islands. This means there are usually not any sea days. But here’s the fun side of that: you’re almost always docked in a port every night. This means you can skip on-board meals and hop off for tapas in Spain or a wine-bar visit in Bordeaux. These nighttime jaunts provide an even deeper immersion into a destination, so you’re not just experiencing it during the day.
7 OF 10
Don’t Expect a Gym Onboard
On river cruises, there often is a “gym,” but the more accurate term is “fitness center” as you can’t fit more than a few people in it. In this very small space will be only one—maybe two—of each piece of equipment. This fitness angle may be lacking on board, when you compare it to large-ship cruises, but fortunately, there’s another way to break into a sweat. River cruises loan out bicycles—either e-bikes or traditional bikes—to explore on your own or through a guided shore excursion. Wouldn’t you rather pedal through vineyards or along the sea than inside a room, anyway?
8 OF 10
Not Learning Basic Language Phrases
On a river cruise, you’re traveling to small villages off the beaten path where locals likely aren’t fluent in English. This is why it’s beneficial to learn the translations for a few greetings and common phrases, such as “hello,” “thank you,” or “where is the bathroom?” Even if you only use Google Translate via your smartphone, that’s still a huge help to shopkeepers. Download it ahead of time and you’re all set. Or go old school and write down on a sheet of paper common questions you plan to ask in that country, in their language.
9 OF 10
Avoid Early-Spring Sailings
You might be looking for a spring-break getaway due to the kids being out of school or just something different than an all-inclusive resort. If that’s the case, then a river cruise likely won’t be satisfying. Here’s why: this time of year, there are often low water levels in Europe (leading to cancelled or adjusted itineraries) and a high chance of humidity in Asia (there’s nothing more oppressive than sweating all day). If you can hold out until May—or autumn, when temps are cooler in Europe and monsoon season is in the rear-view mirror in Asia—to take a river cruise, that’s even better because mild weather will be on your side. You’d rather wear a light jacket on cool nights than slump into a post-humidity spell or not cruise at all, right?
10 OF 10
Don’t Forget to Pack Over-The-Counter Meds
River boats are small. That means only the essentials. A “boutique” is more likely to be a few shelves near the reception desk, not a full-on store as on larger ships. And, in lieu of a medical center staffed by a doctor and other medical professionals, not all river boats have a doctor on board. If you forget to pack over-the-counter medications such as decongestants, aspirin, or allergy relief, your only choice is to buy those in port. We’re pretty sure you’d rather tour an art museum or linger over coffee at a café than run around in search of the nearest pharmacy during your one precious day in a city, town, or village.