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Ten expert-approved methods to help almost everyone feel more comfortable in the air.
Fear of flying, sometimes called aviophobia, is extremely common. Countless people feel uneasy about flying and up to 40% of the population experiences a fear of flying so intense that it can be classified as a disorder.
Widespread fear of flying makes sense, according to Liz Ross, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist in Houston, Texas, and the founder of the Coping Resource Center. “For humans, flying is an unnatural environment. Our ancestors were not suspended in the air for prolonged periods, looking down at the Earth below. Thus, if nothing else, the idea of flying in an airplane can make us feel uncomfortable,” she says. Moreover, even though many of us logically understand that flying is very safe, “The idea that someone else is navigating and flying the plane can cause panic,” she says. “That’s when the what-ifs can creep in,” Ross explains. Others dread turbulence, fixate on a past negative flying experience, or have a hard time coping with the crowds and loud sounds involved in travel, says Dr. Evita Limon-Rocha, a psychiatrist at Kaiser Permanente in Southern California.
Regardless of the cause, there are techniques that can help almost every nervous traveler overcome their fear of flying. According to Limon-Rocha, the first step to overcoming your fear is to accept your feelings so you can address them head-on.
Although I fly about once a month, I’m still a nervous flyer. A visit to an Icelandair training center, where I learned about the airline’s stringent safety protocols, helped quell my fears. Learning coping techniques helped make flying even more pleasant.
Here are 10 methods that can help almost everyone conquer their fear of flying.
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Take Deep Breaths
It sounds simple, but taking deep breaths can help nervous flyers cope with their fears. That’s because anxiety about flying may provoke a fight-or-flight response that leads to shallow, rapid breathing. That breathing pattern may cause a rapid heartbeat, dizziness, headaches, and other symptoms that may trigger additional panic and stress.
“Slow, diaphragmatic breathing helps reverse this response by signaling safety to the nervous system, Ross says. Start by placing one hand on your chest and the other on your belly. “When you inhale, you want to see your belly blow up like a balloon and for your chest to remain relatively still,” Ross explains. “Focusing on longer exhales, rather than forcing deep breaths, can lower heart rate and reduce physical tension,” she says. Practicing this technique regularly before travel makes it easier to use while flying, Ross explains.
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Progressively Relax Your Muscles
Fear of flying often manifests as muscle tension, such as clenching your jaw, shoulders, or hands, Ross explains. Using progressive muscle relaxation before or during a flight can reduce physical discomfort and prevent anxiety from escalating, she says.
“Progressive muscle relaxation involves intentionally tightening and then releasing muscle groups, which helps the body distinguish between tension and relaxation,” Ross says.
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Use Mindful Grounding Techniques
When anxiety spikes, the mind often jumps ahead to worst-case scenarios, Ross says. “Mindful grounding helps bring attention back to the present moment by anchoring awareness in physical sensations, such as the feeling of your feet on the floor, the seat beneath you, or sounds in the cabin,” she explains. Mindful grounding won’t completely eliminate anxious thoughts, but it “reduces their intensity by interrupting catastrophic thinking and keeping the brain oriented to what’s actually happening now,” she says.
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Keep Yourself Busy
Keeping your mind occupied can help distract you and stop anxious thoughts, Limon-Rocha says. Getting lost in a good book, creating a killer playlist, or watching an engaging movie can help get your mind off the fear of flying, she says. Bringing something to hold or squeeze, such as a stress ball, can also help Limon-Rocha says. For the best results, plan a variety of activities you can do from your airplane seat before boarding.
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Avoid Substances That Can Make Anxiety Worse
It may be tempting to knock back a beer or sip a cocktail before a flight to help calm your fears. However, Limon-Rocha advises against downing alcoholic beverages in the airport bar before a flying. Alcohol may temporarily make you feel better, but ultimately leads to heightened anxiety. Plus, “alcohol use can affect your judgement,” which may lead you to act out as a result of your fears, Limon-Rocha explains. Additionally, Limon-Rocha recommends that nervous flyers avoid caffeine before flights because caffeine can also make anxiety worse.
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Be Kind to Yourself and Pretend You Are Helping a Friend
When your fear of flying starts to creep in, treat yourself with compassion, the same way you would treat a dear friend having a hard time, says Alison McKleroy a licensed psychotherapist at Center for Spark. When you find yourself getting stressed or anxious about flying it can help to think about what you would say to help comfort a friend experiencing the same fear, she says. “Usually, those worries are just a protective part of you trying to keep you safe, even if it’s a bit overprotective,” McKleroy explains. “You can say to that part of yourself, ‘I appreciate that you’re trying to protect me but I can handle this.’” That kindness actually lowers the intensity of the fear,” she explains.
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Educate Yourself About Flight Safety
Flying is the safest way to travel, and it gets safer every year. “Educating yourself about turbulence, aviation safety, and aircraft mechanics enables you to challenge anxiety-provoking thoughts about flying using real data,” Ross says. In Ross’ practice, many patients are apprehensive about turbulence. To help, she suggests taking a cup of half-filled water and watching how little it moves during turbulence. “You will notice that the movement is much less pronounced than you might imagine,” she says. Learning more about flying can help you “recalibrate the actual risks of flying and turbulence versus what your anxiety might be telling you,” Ross explains.
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Try Exposure Therapy
According to Ross, exposure therapy is currently the gold-standard treatment for fears and phobias, including fear of flying. “The goal is to learn that a fearful sensation is uncomfortable, but not dangerous.” Repeatedly exposing yourself to a feared situation helps fears “melt away into the ordinary, Ross explains. Taking short flights can help, but that’s not feasible for everyone. Instead, Ross suggests practicing being near airplanes by watching them take off and land at an airport, listening to the sounds of airplanes taking off and landing, and watching videos of people on planes.
Another option for exposure therapy is using virtual reality exposure therapy (VERT), Ross says. VERT involves creating a virtual immersive flying environment, from walking through the airport to creating turbulence with various levels of intensity. Throughout the process, a therapist typically stays with their patient to narrate and label fear responses, help build confidence in approaching fears, and modify exposure as needed, Ross explains. “Research supports that virtual reality exposures can be as effective as real-life exposures and are more time- and cost-effective,” Ross says.
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Make a Plan That Addresses Your Fears
Having a plan to deal with your fears head-on can help some people cope with their fear of flying, says Steven Sultanoff, Ph.D., a psychologist and adjunct professor at Pepperdine University Graduate School of Education and Psychology. For example, many people who are afraid of dying in a plane crash are actually afraid of what would happen to their loved ones. Creating a plan for who would care for your children can help, he says. Or, if someone is afraid of getting sick on a plane, they can book an aisle seat near the bathroom, he suggests. If a nervous flyer is afraid of becoming emotionally unstable due to their fear, they should plan to carry comfort items such as a soft blanket or favorite foods to help them cope, Sultanoff says. Developing a plan for what to do if you become nervous during turbulence, such as looking to flight attendants for reassurance or asking them if you are in danger, can help get through the situation, he says.
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Seek Professional Support
Not everyone needs professional support to overcome a fear of flying, but seeing a therapist or psychiatrist can help those with an intense fear. It’s time to seek professional help if your fear of flying interferes with travel, work, or relationships, your fear is shaping your plans and life decisions, or your reactions are excessive in comparison to the situation, Ross explains. A therapist can help you pinpoint which parts of flying are the most difficult for you and develop personalized strategies to combat your fear.
Additionally, medication may be appropriate for some people who are afraid to fly, Sultanoff says. However, he notes that in long-run medication only provides short-term relief but does nothing to address the underlying fear. Accordingly, therapy or other techniques may still be needed.